Although it was wanted we where never meant to be together or could we ever be friends we forced it. Although I did not want to let it go because I had never had a girl pay that much attention to me before. We had not spent that much time with each other out side of school lately so I was looking for my next big shot. She invited me to this thing called the 7 project. I really did not care what was going to happen there, I just wanted to be with her for a time.
At the beginning it was like a normal kind of "teen" party which was supervised. There was free food, games, a band just a normal thing. Then it all stopped. The next thing I remember is listening to this guy start to talk about Jesus. *I still get cold chills talking about it- I just got some
* The more he talked about Jesus the more I began to cry. I herd a voice inside me to listen to what this guy had to say. Near the end I was close to breaking down. He called us all down to the floor and there was all the people from local churches. I remember grabbing this old woman crying and saying thank you about 300 times. She said "It takes a real man to cry." Funny I never got her name. After I left the woman I went looking for my girlfriend who had o so suddenly disappeared. I couldn't find her for like 30 mins but the overwhelming feeling that that had put apon me was still there so I was balling in the middle of this gym with about 1000 people in there. Then this man grabbed me and hugged me and told me about the Holy spirit (which I had no concept of at the time) he gave me his phone number and told me if I had any questions to call him. (I never did) So I finally found my gf who was with her youth pastor crying. But she did not want to be around me at the time. Which really ticked me off. I became more focused on her than God, and what had happened that night. I just kept thinking why did she just leave me like that? I was baling in the middle of the floor and she just left me. My parents called me and made me leave that night before I actually wanted to. But I got this youth bible. Which really made no since to me. I would read it. It would say something like. "I never fit in any where" then it would say Fact: Jesus loves you. I just didn't understand. But in the youth bible it told me all I needed to do to be saved is ask Jesus into my heart. So I did. And well I remained the same. Still doin the same things.
I broke up with my gf about a month later. Then I really got to be in a close relationship with my friends. We camped every weekend and did everything together. We where a bunch of idots. AND I LOVED IT. We sinned as much as any unbeliever sins. I remeber talking about God around the camp fire. And I told them about my experience. How I cried and stuff, My friends reply was "Yea they make you feel guilty for not going to church and stuff." Then he said, "If I told you the flying spaghetti monster existed would you believe me?" Making my other friend comment and say "f*** the 7 project" That actually really got to me but I believed in God still. I just wasn't born again.
Soon after I was 16 I was on this stupid thing with music. I was worshiping Kurt Cobain. (Lead singer of Nirvana) But while on the net one night I herd in the other room a preacher on tv. Guess who it was............. come on you will never have guessed it. Joel Osteen! I herd what he had to say and I was like yea sure God is kool. So I downloaded the podcast he offers. I watched if for about a month. If you ever watch a joel osteen podcast at the end he says We never leave without asking the lost to become saved. And then he utters that one prayer saved thing. I must have said that prayer at least 100 times. But I never felt anything.
So im on youtube one day. I searched Joel osteen. And in one of the related videos section was a user by the name of VenomfangX..... His video Proof God exists.(I do not agree with his YEC stuff now but what he has done I could never pay back to him) I watched all his videos. Including his "biblical" view of salvation. Where he told me to repent. So I did. Actually like I think a few days after that I masturbated for the last time. So I was born again! And still am! I always will be. What the Lord has done for me is nothing short of AWESOMENESS!!! But it still puzzles me why he would even bother with me.
So yea I hope you enjoyed my journey. Its like a novel. If you would like to know what happened to my gf well I don't know. We don't talk to eachother that much any more. She says that God is a big part of her life. (He is your life) lol
Peace of Christ with you brothers and sisters.
